The Real Ironman is in the Training...

Yesterday I pushed myself at the last minute to get in my training. Just doing that lifted my spirits immensely. It's amazing the positive feelings that training brings to you, perhaps it's brain chemistry shifts or it's just that sense of satisfaction and forward movement.

This morning I slept in a bit. That's unusual for me. There is many benefits working from home developing and launching an app, one is it's not a 9 am - 5 pm job. Work can be done day or night and that creates great flexibility which is helpful when training for an Ironman. Being able to sleep longer aids recovery big time.

That extra 2 hours of sleep this morning made a big difference. My body felt more recovered and mentally I was somewhat ready for today.

I say somewhat because I went back to an old training schedule that has me doing a moderate bike and moderate run on the same day. That's close to 5 hours of training on a weekday. I did this routine in 2009 when I made it to the world championships. Then I started splitting the days and doing a moderate run on one day and a moderate bike on a different day. I always felt I got more benefit doing them on the same day, it was just hard physically and finding the time.

This morning I got caught up in work, I was preparing and application to go on the TV show Shark Tank. Then I had a dentist appointment. It worked out okay as it was raining most of the morning and I'm not training in the rain anymore. Those days are over.

Finally it stopped and I got out the door around 2:30 pm. It was hot, humid and super windy out. It was so windy that branches were breaking off trees and the road was full of leaves. On branch almost landed on my head.

It was hot and humid, around 32 C. I like the head and I love humidity. It was still tough to ride in I went through 3 - 20 ounce bottles of Gatorade. It was a very slow ride into the wind. However my legs don't know the difference. If I didn't have a speedometer I wouldn't have guessed how slow I'm now riding. I ride by keeping track of cadence and heart rate. That's it. Fitness and speed will come over time. I keep my cadence at 90 revolutions per minute and my heart rate under 138 bpm.

I was trying to research how weight effects cycling speed. The only thing I found was that for every 5 lbs extra over a 5 km climb at 7% you will lose 30 seconds. Which means I'm about 2.5 minutes slower than I used to be. Another article said my ideal cycling weight would be 166 lbs. I haven't been 166 lbs since I was 19 years old and got into triathlons. To get to that weight I'd have to lose 40 lbs. If I were to get to 166 lbs I for sure be insanely fast on the bike. My legs are getting strong regardless and I can't imagine if I lost the weight and kept the leg muscle gained. Like I said it would be insanely fast.

When I returned from my ride I got home just in time. I was fading. All I could do was drink liquids. My body is craving liquids. I follow my standard routine of having recoverite and a protein drink or shake and beta Alanine after every session. It definitely aids the recovery. In just 2 weeks I've went from feeling like I was in the worst shape of my life and every session hurting to now feeling back to normal and not feeling leg pain or cramping.

I got home around 6 pm. I still had a 90 minute run I needed to get done before the end of the night. I was so tired I needed to lie down and I fell asleep. It wasn't a normal nap. It was one of those naps that you can't open your eyes if you wanted to naps. It was coma like.

Eventually I was able to open my eyes and the last thing I wanted to do was run. I had all kinds of reasons why I shouldn't in my mind. In the end I just figured it's best I run. I only have 6 weeks of training left for Ironman Boulder and its' moments like this that prepare you for doing Ironmans. Why pass up such and opportunity to push your body beyond where it and your mind wants to go. This is an example of why being an Ironman is when you push yourself out the door to train. To me the real Ironman event is the training. The race its self is just the victory lap.

A big concern I had about the run was my pelvis and the soreness I've been having. This run was going to be a test. I find if I do leg raises and crunches after training it helps repair it and it's better for the next run.

Tonight's run I adjusted my running style and spread my legs out a little and focused on putting the pressure on my front hips and not the pelvis. It worked. It was a much more enjoyable run with no pain or pelvis discomfort.

Most of the run was in the dark. It was still humid out. I enjoy mixing up my training times. Training in the dark every once and a while is like finding a new running route. It creates a different ambiance during the run. I find on night runs I really get into my own head. Tonight I was there. The more you can get into your own head the more time flies.

When I got home Alice said if felt to her that I was gone 2 or 2.5 hours. To me I was gone 90 minutes and it felt like an hour or less with me thinking through things. Running and cycling definitely makes me a better business person and leader. It is a great, non pressure way to just think through a situation and options. The less you focus on it when you run the easier the ideas and solutions just come to you. I don't concentrate on problems or formally set aside time, I just run and "boom" a vision will appear in my minds eye.

I got back home at 10:45 pm. Did my stretching. It feels great to not want to train, then do it and do it so late at night and get it done.

Today I completed Day 4 of my 7 Day challenge to eat healthy, no snacking and no beer. It was definitely easier than day 3. Day three was the hump day.

For shits and giggles I wanted to check my training diary to see how far I've trained since May 2007. It turns out it was 66,870.18 km or 41,459 miles. That's swimming, biking and running 1.5 times around the circumference of the earth to put it in perspective.

The unfair thing is that with all that training you would think it's impossible to gain weight or to get heavy. Unfortunately not. Only diet will keep you trim. I also figured out in those same 6 years I've probably had 1200 beers (conservatively) per year. That's 7400 beers over that time span. Non conservatively I think it's closer to 11,000. Could you imaging what I'd look like if I didn't train.

I did get some hope today that I might be start to lose weight. I came in at 203.8 lbs down from 206.4 lbs two days ago. My goal on this 7 day challenge is getting down 7 - 10 lbs.

Mod Bike - 3:12:50 / 76.42 km
Mod Run - 1:29:35 / 15.33 km

P.S.Looking for all the support I could get as I fundraise for Doctors without Borders. Big our small donations welcome. Support a great cause. http://events.doctorswithoutborders.org/participant/bryanpayne

Who's Your Momma...

Trying to Smile as I'm grunting out on the calf press Selfie

Today was a turning point. It was my day 3 of my 7 day challenge to eat healthy, no snacking and no beer.

I woke up beat up and tired from this weeks training. I'm worried about my pelvis and I just wasn't in the mood to train. I procrastinated and did inside computer work all day long. Dragging it out.

Part of my day was spent dealing with an issue that was causing me some angst which made me a little out of sorts and irritable. I was not in the mood to train.

There was points I was justifying not training today in my mind as I'm getting older and I need recovery time. Which is true if I was running or cycling today. If that was the case I would need a break. It's not true when you have to do weights and a swim.

At around 4 pm the World Cup was on. I wasn't having the best day and I was thinking what would be awesome right now would be to sit down and watch the game with an ice cold draft beer. I could visualize it so clearly.

Then there was the self talk. Telling myself that if I have that one beer the prior two days have been a total waste. Reminding myself how hard it is to drag an extra 20 lbs around on the bike and run. Remembering Reid's words to focus on the goal and succeeding and then you don't need discipline.

The biggest motivator was that I didn't want to sabotage myself and have to start over. I finally came to the conclusion that I may not train today but I'm not going to eat unhealthy or drink beer. I figured that if I still eat healthy and drink no alcohol the day is still a win. If I don't train and then eat poorly or drink alcohol then the day has been a total failure.

To lose the amount of weight I need, er, want to lose it will take more days of eating healthy and avoiding beer than it will training consistently. I've said it over and over again and it's proven true, the only way to lose weight is through diet. Diet is 90% of losing weight, exercising is 10% and if anyone tells you differently they are lying. I know this to be factual.

There was an interview with Mathew McConaughey I saw recently. The interviewer was asking him about the incredible amount of weight he dropped for the movie Dallas Buyers Club. He played a man with aids. McConaughey told the interviewer that losing weight was all diet. He tried to exercise his weight away and couldn't. He had to adhere to a strict diet and it was hard.

Fact is it's even harder when you get older. Once you turn 40 years old losing weight becomes much tougher. If you've been doing Ironman's or endurance sports for a number of years it's even harder as your body is so efficient at converting food into fat to support your training. When you stop training the body doesn't realize it and keeps converting food into fat as it still thinks it needs to.

As I mentioned today I was oh so close to eating crap and having a beer. What helped me aside from not wanting to let outside forces have any power over me was that I spent some time sorting and deleting personal images. I deleted 2200 off my computer. Going through the images I saw many of me in my peak shape in 2009 and 2010.

It was kind of motivating to see that and imagine what it would feel like to be back at that weight and fitness again. I'm on track to do it and I know it I just need to stay the course. Easier said than done.

This morning I stood on the scale and started the day depressed when I saw 205.8 lbs. Which basically means I did 10 hours of training over two days and ate perfectly, had no beer and was now up 1.4 lbs. That's where you ask yourself if it's even worth the effort.

The answer is yes. I've been hear before. It's not fair. It takes about 3 weeks of constant training and eating properly until you start to lose pounds. At first you start gaining muscle, which weights more than fat and then as you continue to train hard and stress and tear down your muscles your body retains water to repair the damage. You don't see weight loss until a few weeks go by and your body adjusts and equalizes once again.

So here I am today not in be best frame of mind. I did have a win in I reached a point that even if I don't train I'm not sabotaging my diet regardless.

I was physically and mentally tired and at 7 pm decided to go upstairs to watch TV in the bedroom. My plan was to fall asleep and I mentioned to Alice if I did fall asleep to wake me by 10 pm for a business meeting. I actually went to the bedroom for two reasons. The first was to put a show on with therapeutic sound, like the guys voice from Frontline, in this case it was Real Sports on HBO and the second reason was to keep me away from the kitchen and temptations of the pantry.

It worked and then some.

An email came to me that removed my angst I had for most of the day and that along with the rest got my motivation back. I looked at the clock at 8 pm and saw that I had two hours until my meeting. I sprang up, got my gym and swim stuff and headed to LA Fitness.

Earlier in the day Reid went and came back feeling great. Then as I was leaving Alice told me Alyssa was there working out. In only one hour I went from bailing on training today to ready to attack and I did.

I blasted the weights. I took some C4 before and blasted the weights. Pushing more weight than I have in a long time. I didn't mail this workout in. I went hard. It was the most sweat I've ever generated in a weight training workout ever. I'd say 90% of my shirt was wet from sweat.

Then I hit the pool. Hitting the cool water of the pool after weight training is heaven. If I wasn't weight training before the cool water is a little uncomfortable until you get swimming and warm up a bit.

I've discovered why I dislike swimming so much. It's because it's all about sets and time. You are constantly looking at your watch and doing intervals. Tonight I decided not to focus on intervals. I just swam. Just like I bike and just like I run. I don't focus on time and just do. Doing so made for such a much more enjoyable swim. I enjoyed it.

My arms were sore from the weight training so it wasn't a fast swim. The women in the lane beside me was going much faster than me and then my competitive spirit bubbles up. I was doing my own thing and she was keeping up to my freestyle stroke with her breast stroke. I couldn't take it any longer and near the end I started picking up the pace and matching her stroke for stroke.

If your a triathlete you've been there. You're at the pool and the person the lane over becomes your competition and vice versa and with no words you just start competing. I've done it many times. At the end of tonight's swim I decided to turn on the burners and went from behind her to way in front of her over just 25 yards. I flew by so fast that it basically said to her that he was playing possum.

The upside to all that is she made me work harder and by her being beside me it made me have a much better workout.

Today is one of those major wins. I went from not wanting to train. To not wanting to eat health. To wanting to have a beer and then it all turned around. I ate perfectly healthy, I didn't have beer and I trained and both the sessions were awesome. Especially the weight training.

To me the day isn't over until midnight. I got it all done, just 2 hours under the wire.

Weights - 45 min
Swim - 49:03 / 2190 meters

Oh, almost forgot. Alice got a Fitbit. Mine broke so we got new ones. In her first day of just running errands she got 14,000 steps. I think I did 1400 steps today. She's super competitive with herself and she was checking it throughout the day. So her I am Mr. Ironman and she kicks my ass on Fitbit today.

Also below is Reid's school film project. He did it over 2 evenings. It was totally improvised, they had no script. He had no camera man and he had to do acting and then had to edit it. It's his first film project he's done in 5 years, since he was 12 or 13. He took it seriously and all things considered I think he did a great job.

I'm expecting a call from the school. They are not to have drugs, alcohol, guns, violence or swearing and his video has them all.

This is hard...

View Left...Toronto

So I finished my second real week of training. Last week was a break in week and I did 11 hours and pretty much died after every session. This week I upped it to 19 hours of training.

Yesterday I did my first long bike ride of the year, 109 miles in 6 hours 50 minutes, followed by a 30 minute brick run, then today I did my first long run of the year, 22 km in 2 hours 20 minutes.

I'm not going to lie I'm not enjoying the training. First I'm too heavy and it's painful and second for the first time I'm wondering if this is going to be my last Ironman, or at least for a while.

I have this romantic thing going through my head that maybe if I just train like a regular person. Maybe an hour a day. Or a long bike that is only 2 hours on a Saturday. Basically I'm re-evaluating my Ironman lifestyle.

This weekend for example I didn't do anything but train. Yesterday was 7.5 hours and then relaxing on the couch watching a movie with Alice. Then today I got up at 7:30 am and was out the door for my long run at 8 am. I got home by 10:30 am and was pretty tired.

Intentionally I didn't lay on the couch and sleep. I wanted to. This was my first long run this year and it was extremely slow and I the entire time I was feeling pelvis pain. I had that issue last year and it effected my training and I had to bail from Mount Tremblant.

Before I left the house I was dreading my run. I was visualizing the route I take and I was feeling sick. I've done that route so many times and have never really dreaded it. I guess I was curious how much it was going to hurt and I wasn't looking forward to it.

Doing the first long run of the year is always tough. Doing it less than 24 hours after a 109 mile bike ride makes it even tougher. I didn't know how painful it was going to be. I debated in my mind if I should do the full 2:20 or just do 2 hours to be safe and reduce likelihood of injury. I was running so slow I decided to go the distance, and I didn't want to have any regrets.

View Right - Lake Ontario

I was glad I pushed myself out the door early. If I didn't I would have the weight of having to get my long run in over my head all day. It's always better to get it done early and get it over with. It also doesn't wreck your day.

Not that it mattered. I was pretty beat up after today's run. It was a nice day and I forced myself to go outside and try to enjoy the day. Alice and I ran errands, picking up a rug for the deck. The idea is we put the rug at the top of the deck with plastic under it, we have a walkout, and viola we have a roof above us when it rains so we can sit under it when we are on the lower deck. They had all these expensive solutions and Alice came up with this great idea. Instead of spending a $1000 or more, it cost us $113. Winning.

We did more running around. I needed to get some metal targets for my pellet gun shooting in the backyard. I got some good ones from Sail that I'm very excited to set up on the fence. Now I can sit under the deck, rain or shine, and shoot stuff while having a beer. Canadian redneck style.

When we got back we watched some World Cup Soccer, then some Netflix and I drifted in and out of sleep. I was so beat up from today's run.

On the run and afterwards I've been having a come to Jesus talk with myself. I'm just not sure if I want to keep putting myself through the torture of training. It's tough on a couple of levels. The training itself is long and time consuming. It's hard on the body. It takes me away from hanging with Alice and the family. It's painful. It would be nice to enjoy my Saturday's and Sundays.

It's easier to train and stay motivated when you have issues.

For me I got back into it to initially prove a person I worked with wrong who laughed when I told him I was an Ironman and 50lbs over weight, even though I hadn't done an Ironman in 16 years. I then lost the 50 lbs and showed him that being an Ironman is always in your spirit and once an Ironman, always an Ironman.

Then it was to keep me sane during some difficult economic and restricting times at work. I needed the mental break to take my mind off work and put some joy and success in my life. After that it became about being the best I could be and making it to the World Championships in Clearwater, Kona and ITU world championships representing my country.

After that my motivation to train for Ironman's became to ensure I stay in shape, show myself I'm still mentally and physically strong, keeps you confident in yourself and it's a twisted weight loss program. No matter how much I let myself go by signing up for an Ironman you know that motivation to be ready for race day will bring you back to where you want to be.

Now I'm re-evaluating. My priorities and motivations are starting to change. I'm losing the joy of training and racing Ironmans. Maybe I just need a break from it? I'm not sure. If I cross the finish line in Boulder it will be my 9th Ironman in 6 years. It would be 10 but I had to drop out of Ironman China after 10 hours. Oh, and I did do the ITU Long course championship. So it could be argued that I've done 11 Ironman's in 6 years. Not to mention just as many if not more half Ironmans.

Although it could look like burn out. I see it more as "done that been there got the tee shirts".

I've been going through a lot of personal reflection this past year. Lots has happened personally and career wise. Having blood clots a couple years back got me thinking about mortality. It's taken a while and I'm finally getting some clarity.

I never thought of mortality before. I'm now at an age that I am, often. I often think of the Steve Jobs Stanford Convocation speech and I can really relate to this paragraph...

Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.

There is other parts that resonate with me as well. To read the full speech you can click here.

This gets me asking myself what's important to me. If I had less than five years to live how would I change my life?

What I'd do....
1.  Spend more time with family and try to do as many fun things together. Could be hanging out in the back yard with a fire, going to local events, pubs, restaurants and family travel. I'd take advantage of all the cool things Ontario has to offer.
2.  Stay in shape and workout a reasonable 5 - 7 hours a week and add in some new stuff. Maybe weights or boxing or whatever.
3.  Eat healthy, probably a Ketosis diet. I find that great for the mind and it keeps the weight off.
4.  Enjoy my beer responsibly.

What I wouldn't do...
1.  I wouldn't put in 19 - 24 hours a week of training. You can't take a fit body with you.
2.  I wouldn't do any job that I don't enjoy fully or is all consuming just for the money.

As I write this I'm pretty sure this is going to be my last Ironman, at least for a while. Mentally that will help me enjoy the next 6 weeks of training. I'll want to train and smell the roses as best I can. I guess it's the equivalent of a professional athlete letting everyone know it's their last year playing.

We'll see how it all unfolds. I had a moment on Friday in the Pig & Whistle and I visualized a complete different mind set that gave me a whole new perspective on life and how I'll engage with it moving forward. It has to do with letting go and not forcing or controlling life but riding the wave of life and enjoying the ride.

On the 7 day challenge of eating healthy, no snacking and no beer. I made it through Day 2. It WASN'T easy. After the run I thought nothing would be more relaxing than sitting down with a beer and watching the World Cup in the Pig & Whistle and maybe having some movie style popcorn.

Then we went out to the Keg for fathers day and it would have been nice to pig out on some appetizers and have a big steak, baked potato and beer. Instead I had salmon, vegetables, ice berg salad and diet coke.

I've been getting the hunger pangs and fighting through them. For a snack I've been having yogurt or making a protein smoothie.

The reason I'm able to keep focused is I keep thinking how hard it is to train with the excess weight. It's more difficult to do the training with the excess weight than to stop eating. I keep thinking that if I can get through 7 days and even lose 5 lbs I'll be farther ahead. I can't think beyond 7 days then it becomes a fantasy of what could happen and not a reality.

Over dinner I was talking with Reid and I told him how much discipline it takes not to eat. He said to me I was looking at it all wrong. That you don't focus on keeping disciplined, that you focus on what it takes to be successful. It's about wanting to achieve your ultimate goal and doing what it takes to succeed.

It's very cool when you get to a stage in life when you start learning from your kids. Tonight was just the four of us going for dinner and having good meaningful conversation. It was a great fathers day present.

The 7 Day Challenge...

I don't know what it is but I'm sleeping lots. Normally I'm a 7 hour max type of sleeper. In the past 2 weeks I've had probably at least 3 or 4 sleeps between 10 - 12 hours. I woke up this morning after a 11 hour sleep.

The plan for training today was a 6 hour 45 min long bike ride followed by a 30 min brick. I was not looking forward to it. If I wasn't racing for Doctors without Borders during this Ironman I may have bailed on it and maybe even the Boulder Ironman.

Instead I pushed myself out the door and hoped I'd be able to do the ride mentally and physically.

It was sunny but a little cool and windy. I was under dressed a bit and it wasn't that comfortable of a ride. It was a slow ride for two reasons, I'm fat at 206 lbs and I was riding into the wind it seemed all the time.

You really realize that weight has an effect on cycling speed. At my lowest racing weight I was 180lbs, that's 26 lbs lighter than I am now. Back then my average speed for a long ride would be 30 kph and this ride I was 25.7 kph. I never in a million years could think I would ever ride that slow. That's the speed of 60 year old women who do Ironmans.

I was passed by everyone today. The only people I passed were two migrant workers on old heavy bikes with baskets on the front and I barely passed them. I had other cyclist pass me and I thought in my old shape I would have been passing them.

This is what got me thinking. I've got to lose weight and thinking in terms of weeks is too long. I need to set a short term goal and make it happen. What if I just did a 7 day challenge with myself to only eat healthy and no beer? I thought about it and figured it's something I could do. If I did it I'd probably lose 5 - 10 lbs too. I really need to do something as it's hard cycling heavy.

Along the way I came across a guy who's bike was upside down at the side of the road. I asked him if he needed help and he said it was probably too serious to fix. It was. His full derailleur fell off going up number one side road. I then asked him if he had a cell phone and he did but it wasn't picking up a signal or working. So I borrowed him mine and he called his wife to pick him up. It was a nice break 45 minutes before finishing. It did feel good helping someone out as well.

I find once I can get by 5 hours my mind gets in a trance and I can go as far as I need too. I too had a technical problem at hour 5 in that my odometer broke down. There is nothing more frustrating. I had another watch which I was able to use as my back up.

Where I ride it's beautiful and lots of hills. They are not steep and long, they are smaller and consistent. I'm not it create riding shape so there was a lot of small ring gear using and standing on my pedals. When I'm in great shape I never take it out of the big ring and never stand up.

I was pleasantly surprised that my legs felt pretty good. They were actually sore in the beginning and as time went on they got stronger. Yes got stronger. It's something that happens to me. I seem to excel the longer the distance. I'm made for Ironman.

When I got home as much as I'd like to just stop, stretch and rest I couldn't. I had a 30 min brick run and I was afraid. It would be my first brick run of the year and I wondered if I would even be able to run the entire time or would I have to walk.

Turns out I had a great run. Fairly fast too. As always the first 500 meters my legs are a little rubbery as they transition from the bike muscles to the running muscles. I really like that feeling. Many don't as it could hurt. I find it a very interesting sensation to feel that transition. It doesn't take long for me to get into the groove and not feel it. There is that moment from the bike to getting in the comfort zone that you can't describe and you only know what I mean after you've experienced it. It's the same with bonking.

When I got home I did my stretching, took my post workout Recoverite, Whey protein and Beta Alanine. I surprised myself in that I felt great. I wasn't overly tired or sore and could easily go out for dinner or to party if that was the plan. This is a very good sign and a definite mental boost that even in my current shape I should be able to finish the Boulder Ironman. It would hurt a

I figured today was Day 1 of my challenge if I ate healthy and had no beer. I'd rather start today than tomorrow. If I start today then tomorrow I only have to eat healthy and no beer for 6 more days. Dinner was a salad and stuffed pepper. Feel free to join me in this challenge.

I've told people this more times than I can remember. You need to diet in order to lose weight. Training crazy amount of hours won't do it. Sadly if I have a beer after today's 7.5 hours of training it will shut off my fat burning system and all the training I did today will be for not from a weight loss standpoint.

On my rides I've learned that putting your fitbit on your shoe helps get those steps up. They underestimate the amount of work you do but it's still nice to see the numbers move up. I'm connected to others that have fitbit and I definitely look at their daily results and it's competitive. I want to have more steps than them.

Throughout my ride today I took pictures. It's just a beautiful place to ride. This year the roads are a little beat up from this wicked winter. Most winters out here are not too cold and we don't get a lot of snow. It was the opposite this year.

Bike - 6:50:13 / 175.6 km
Run - 30:31 / 5.5 km

P.S. Looking for all the support I could get as I fund raise for Doctors without Borders. Big our small donations welcome. Support a great cause. http://events.doctorswithoutborders.org/participant/bryanpayne

Friday's are dangerous...

The plan was to do my long ride today. I had a guy coming to reset the remote for the downstairs entertainment system at 8:30 am and figured I'd be on the road for my long bike by 9:30 am.

Nope, not the case.

Turns out it was a lot more work than he anticipated. I had it set up by another guy who owns a company before and he mailed it in. He's a nice guy and all and he's exactly my age and he's been doing what he's been doing for years and years and now I can tell it's just not appealing to him any longer.

The tell tale sign was when he told me he didn't know exactly how the receiver worked it was an older model and he was the guy who sold it to me. He then showed me that ALL I have to do is press some other buttons on the receiver and it will all work good.

Problem is I don't remember what buttons he's talking about and so I got frustrated and just started pushing all the buttons and before I knew it nothing worked. I wasn't going to call my mail it in stereo guys so I found a new one and he came over this morning.

He had his hand on his head a lot and was trying to figure stuff out. I have DVD, Apple TV, Cable, Surround Sound and Sirius. There is also two zones in the house. The most important zone to me is the one in the Pig & Whistle and outside as that's were we hang out most to listen to 70's music.

It took the guy 2.5 hours to figure it all up and set it up and he didn't mail it in. He even set it up better than I expected with Sirius always playing on zone two in the P & W and it works great because I have a separate volume control in there.

After he left I took some saran wrap and wrapped the front of the receiver so no one could turn dials or anything. Myself included.

The remote we got is from Harmony and what I like most about it is its and an app on my phone that is a one push and it starts everything up and syncs it all up. It take about 5 remotes and puts them all into one. It's very cool.

The 2.5 hours through my schedule. I had to pull an audible and move my long ride to tomorrow as I didn't want to be out riding after 4 pm on on Friday. Fridays are very dangerous for bike training. I think it's because it's the end of the week and people aren't paying attention and are tired or they've had some beers and are emailing and texting as they drive. Friday bike riding scares me.

I was also feeling a little fatigued in the legs. I just came off two days of speed work sessions and I had a pretty good pump in the legs. I've learned the hard way that sometimes rest is better than training. I really learned that from some guys in their 70's and 80's at Kona during the Ironman in 2010 when I raced it.

Sitting at their table I was amazed how these old guys did it and they explained as you get older rest is so much more important and beneficial. They have no option but to take longer recovery periods. I thought that was interesting.

In the past I'd feel guilty if I took a day off to recovery. It was a mistake to think that way.

There is also a certain liberation knowing that you are not competing to qualify for Kona and that you are just there to finish and have fun. It means you don't have to take your training so seriously.

Frankly this will be the first ride of the year and I'm not looking forward to it. It's to be a 6 hour 45 minute ride followed by a 30 min brick run. I know it's going to hurt and be mind numbing and not just yet sure how much. I used to eat these long rides for breakfast now I'm thinking "ugghhh do I have to?". The answer is yes, unfortunately. There is no mailing in being able to do an Ironman without training long for it.

So instead I spent the day doing a little work and watching World Cup soccer in the Pig & Whistle. I'm really getting into it. It only comes around every 4 years and I'm not even a big Soccer fan and I enjoy it. I think it's because it's a slower game. I can follow the ball not like hockey where it's hard to follow the puck especially in my old age.

Reid was working on his short film for school project today. It's pretty cool. They shot it in two evenings and he was editing it. The school said you are not allowed to do anything with drugs, alcohol, tobacco, guns, or violence. Reid don't care his film has all those things. I should expect a call from the school. I don't really care if you are in grade 2 and watch TV you see all those things and the goal is for him to learn and no better way than doing something you are interested in.

I actually think kids feel more pressure to succeed today than when I was a kid. Reid put together a blooper reel and I watched it. There wasn't a lot of laughing. It was all serious and just flub ups of lines. I could see they were really taking this seriously. I would have been laughing and joking the entire time. Different generation. I actually feel sorry for them.

No Training - Recovery

P.S. Less than $400 needs to be raised for me to meet my fundraising goal. If so inclined and you want to support Doctors without Borders with me representing them at Ironman Boulder, please feel free to contribute. http://events.doctorswithoutborders.org/participant/bryanpayne

It's all about torture...

Yesterday I tortured myself on the bike doing speed work and then tortured myself by eating way to much crap food, like Twix bar, liquorice, Doritos and lots of home made movie style popcorn and beer.

It hurt. You go out and do something good for yourself training wise and you come back and sabotage your efforts. For whatever reason I just couldn't stop eating yesterday.

I know if I just train hard and ate healthy I'd drop weight fairly quickly. I'd also have to get off the beer. In my experience it's very difficult if not near impossible to lose weight and drink alcohol.

Today I tortured myself as well. I did running speed work at a local school track. It was hot and humid out just like I like it. I had the track to myself and I'm sure if someone was watching me run they wouldn't have any idea that I was doing speed work I was that slow. My 400 meter was between 1:45 - 1:50. To put it in perspective it used to be 1:30.

As I was running I was just disgusted with my gut. It all sticking out and everything. I really started to get mad at myself for pigging out yesterday. It felt like the right thing to do yesterday and today I'm paying the price and torturing myself. It was one of those moments that I realized it's easier to say no to junk food than it is to do speed work at the track. Hopefully it's a turning point that sticks.

I love running and always have. Running on a track is different though. It's hard in that you are doing interval training and it's mentally as well as physically tough. It is also very gratifying when you finish. I find an hour on the track is the equivalent of running 90 minutes.

During today's workout I was sweating so hard and I could hardly see from all the salt in my eyes. Since I got the movies style popcorn maker working and I'm using the same supplies as the big movie theatres I've been eating nothing but super salty popcorn and the salt comes out when I sweat and when it hits my eyes they burn as well as being very annoying and reminds me I'm eating way to much unhealthy popcorn.

I finished and was dripping in sweat. That is a good feeling knowing you went as hard as you could regardless of the shape your in. I could definitely feel myself getting stronger especially my legs. I am starting to get pains in my pelvis area and the best way to describe it is a hernia but it's not. I've had this before. It's my core. I need to get back to working my core and the best thing I tried to fix it was the Insanity DVD workouts. I'm somehow going to have to include those into my training regimen.

The pain and suffering of today's speed work session was not all lost on me. It forced me to eat healthy and small portions. Yes you heard that correctly. I didn't have breakfast. I had some Chicken for lunch and a stuffed pepper and a very small amount of linguine for dinner and some beers. No snacking.

If I didn't have the beers it would have been a perfect day. But how can you not have beers when it's day one of the World Cup and you are sitting in the Pig & Whistle watching? And you're committed to having the best summer ever and after the game we sat outside in the warm humid air until close to midnight chilling.

Aside from my regular work stuff I ran a long overdue and very important errand today. I had to pick up a galvanized post for a parking meter I bought of eBay for the Pig & Whistle. I bought it a year or more ago and it's just been lying on the floor. I couldn't buy a pre-made pole so I had to go out and find a pole and then take it to a welder to put on the base.

I found the pole for $25 and found a welding shop that will supply the base and weld it for $35. Then I'm going to get a spray paint can of chrome for $10 from Home Depot and I'll be done. I'll take that out of my "to do" jar.

Then I need to figure out a place to put it. The Pig & Whistle is filling up with stuff and not a lot of open spaces anymore. Alice keeps telling me no more stuff. I keep saying " and it's my Pig & Whistle and I call the decorating shots. On the rest of the house it's all you and you call the shots". Mind you I don't know what more I could add to the P & W I pretty much have everything. It's really a childhood dream come true at this point.

Actually I just thought of what I need. Some pellet gun shooting targets for the back yard. I'm into shooting my pellet gun lately. I have a riffle and a hand gun and I'm an awesome shot with the riffle. I picked off a sparrow through the fence and as it was flying down to the ground. Alice is not happy that I'm shooting birds. Hence I need to get some targets. I'm definitely a Canadian Redneck.

My positive take aways about today. I did my first running speed work session and ate healthy, sans beer.

On the fundraising front thanks very much to those that donated yesterday and day prior. I want to give a big shout out to Matt & Heather Oravec, Tracy Spiva, Peter Takeda, Chris Monson, Adena Andrerson and Nicola Milner. Thanks so much between the 6 of you the total was a $1075. I'm now just $400 shy of my goal of raising $4000 for Doctors without Borders. All donations big and small welcome. Please follow this link if you'd like to donate. http://events.doctorswithoutborders.org/participant/bryanpayne

Speed Run - 54:18 / 10.01 km

Plunging into it like a REAL Athlete...

Another 6:15 am wake up. Getting back to training does that, it resets your internal clock.

The only bummer is that the house is so peaceful at 6:15 am and then Alice's alarm goes off at 7:15 am and then she puts it on snooze and then it goes off again and my nice zen state of morning silence is broken and I actually become a little edgy.

This morning I woke up to rain and it was a little cooler than normal. I don't like training in the rain or cool temperatures so I waited it out before I went out to do speed work on my bike.

Yes you heard correct "speed work".

For those that don't know what it is it's interval training and it's the only way you get stronger and faster. The idea is you go as hard as you can for a period of time then you rest briefly and repeat. The last time I did speed work I can't remember. If I was to guess it would be 3 or 4 years ago. For the last few Ironman's I've just keep it aerobic and did no intensity workouts.

I forgot how hard mentally and physically speed work is and today's first session was just a baby workout. The main set was 15 intervals x 1 minute each of all out effort. Like I said, easy and it still was hard. I have another 7 weeks of this and I remember the ones that are 10 min intervals of all out and those will be upcoming.

The one gift I do have is I can block pain pretty good. I actually think I come by that naturally and I have the last name Payne. In those old days if you were a carpenter your last name would become carpenter. Just like last names Barber (Barber), Archer (archer), Bacchus (worked in a bake house), Bailey (bailiff), Brewster (female brewer), Butler (wine steward) Page (minor male servant), Sawyer (sawed wood), Shepherd (shepard), Turner (made small objects by turning them on a lathe), anyways you get the picture.

So with the last name Payne I've often wondered where it derived from. I have looked into it. Some of my research (surfing the net) shows that it comes from the word Paien and is someone that lives in the country or a person who's religious beliefs are somewhat suspect. It later also became known as "Heathen" and was given to children who's baptism was delayed or, to adults who's religious zeal was not what the standards of the day had indicated it should have been.

I do have to say that describes "me" spot on. I even delayed the Baptism of our children so they are technically heathens I guess.

Now I'm going to go where those recommend you shouldn't. I'm not going to talk politics, I'll talk briefly on religion. I grew up Catholic and went to Catholic schools my entire life except for one year when I got kicked out by the Jesuits and they wouldn't let me return until I picked up a credit and frankly they didn't want me back period. I showed them and got the credit and returned.

Seeing how it all worked from the inside was interesting. It's not all holy and pious. I spent a lot of time in detention and weekend detention and hung out with the priests. I learned they are human. Some smoked pot, one I knew had a girl friend, when I was younger another was identified as a pedophile. Now I'm not saying all priests are bad. Not at all. I'm just saying I realized early they are human with warts and pimples and don't have the "secret sauce".

What I do like about religion is it gives people hope when times are bad. Prayer helps people get through some difficult times, especially when they are not in control. Religion helps teach lessons of morality and sets a water mark of what is good behaviour. In general I think religion does way more good than harm. Mind you it's the zealots that scare me, those are the ones that start the wars.

I left organized religion long ago. I took a different path and started to figure it out on my own. I actually became a better person and less guilt. Being raised Catholic guilt and fear is a cornerstone.

My spiritual journey has and continues to be based on figuring it out for myself. Absorbing from all contacts I have, processing and evaluating. My morality is based on my feelings and you get a certain internal feeling when you do good and you get another when you do harm.

I believe there is a higher power. You can't deny that. I don't see the higher power as someone sitting in heaven on a thrown or one with a lot of young virgins, etc, etc. I see it as a collective energy. I believe we are all interconnected and although we look like separate people we are really a collective form of energy and this doesn't just apply to people it applies to everything in the universe. We are all just one big infinite ball of energy.

That's not to say life is meaningless. It's definitely not. It's to say that let's not overthink it or create dogma. Let's just be and try to live our lives at minimum doing no harm. Which is impossible. I try to live that way and I would say as humans we do the minimum amount of harm as possible.

I also think we need to grow. It's part of our existence. The answers are right in front of us. Everything in the world and universe is born, grows and dies. Nature to me is the greatest teacher all you need to do is observe nature as the same rules of the universe that apply to nature apply to us. Make no mistake we too are part of nature. We just have this feeling of self that distances us from thinking we are not and that we are special.

Now going back to religion. Like I said I think its a good thing. Not all people think like myself, in work and life I've always had the traits of a visionary and leader and constantly challenge the status quo. Others, thankfully are not, we can't have a world of one type of person, and they need guidance and dogma and without it would be lost and it does them a lot of good.

The issues I have with religion are the zealots and hypocrites. What the message of pretty much all religions teach is to be a better person, to rise above, to be god like, to be forgiving, to be kind, to be loving, to be giving and a whole multitude of virtues.

Yet instead the zealots try to ram it down your throat and convince you their way is the only way and it you are a disbeliever in their dogma you are misguided and will never have salvation.

The big ones to me are the hypocrites. These are the ones that go to regular services once a week or more and create a persona or outward appearance to others that they are holy people that have all the virtues of a good person and yet I've seen time and time again these people being the most critical and judgemental on others and behind closed doors and even open ones doing more harm than good and then they repeat the cycle by going back to weekly service or doing some sort of outward volunteer work that is not what they are all about on the inside.

For me and I know this is going to be controversial. I sent my kids to Catholic schools for one reason and one reason only. To get organized religion out of their system. I wanted them to see it from the inside. I wanted them to learn the lessons from the fables of what being a good moral person is and my hope would be they make up their own minds on religion, as I did and hopefully forge the path of self discovery and learning. By then seeing it from the inside the method to my madness was not having a knock on the door one day when they are older and telling me they are born again or have joined some religious group.

If you are reading this and see red or are judging me on any level you need to look into the mirror. I listen to you. I respect you for what you believe in and you should do the same and if you're not maybe you need to accept that your religious beliefs are working for you and you may want to re-evaluate.

There I'm off my soapbox. Back to my training. Actually if I was to say where my church is located it's in the water, on my bike and when I run. That's where I do most of my deep thinking and figure stuff out. I go to the church of "Ironman".

Now you can see how my thoughts drifted. It all started with me explaining how the last name Payne is suitable for me. What if it's not about being a paien?

So why would we have got the last name Payne? I think it could be for one of two reasons. The first is I like Payne. Which is true. I wouldn't do Ironman's if I didn't like pain and I wouldn't do some things in business if I didn't like pain.

The other option is I am a pain. A pain in the ass which I was told many times growing up all through school. At that time kids were much crueler and there was no anti-bulling and maybe I was a pain. I did like bugging people which does play back to my first theory that those with the last name Payne do enjoy pain.

Back to today's training.

As I was mentioning above I did my first speed work session in years. The one thing about doing speed work is it makes you feel like a real athlete.

The only time one used to do speed work is if they were in school and were on the track team or other sport team and you had a coach that was barking out to you to do a specific workout and I think they took great glee in seeing you hurt. It does work though. You get stronger and faster.

So doing it today I felt like a contender again. Even though I don't have the aerobic base I normally have before starting speed work I'm experimenting. My biggest fear is injury. I know I'm risking it and one way or another I'm going to learn from it. No doubt. Nothing ventured nothing gained.

I can feel my body changing already and it's getting stronger. In only 10 days of training I'm transforming. So happy about that. I"m still fat and slow but it's getting easier to haul my fat ass through the workouts.

I actually am looking at it positively and pretending I'm wearing one of those 20 lb weighted vests and that if I do all my training with it on and then take it off I'll actually be farther ahead than if I was training at my goal weight. Please don't burst my bubble on this it's getting me through the day.

There was a photo that was sent to me today from my buddy Allan Nolan. It's a photo of when I was at his house and lets say I plugged the toilet. It's definitely embarrassing when you have to come out and ask for a plunger. But what you going to do, leave it in there and hope they blame it on the kids?

This is a gross discussion I know, but this is an Ironman training blog and we talk about GI issues and all the stuff that goes along with it. So with that said I do know when I'm losing weight and getting back in shape when I become regular if you know what I mean and this morning I lost about 2 lbs and lets just say it was a plunger moment.

Bike Speed work - 1:04:57 / 30.13 km

P.S. If you are feeling all warm and fuzzy and want to help people and support a great cause I'm racing for "Doctors without Borders" at Ironman Boulder and have committed to raising $4000. I'm about $1300 shy. Any donations are welcome, big or small. Doesn't matter and all are greatly appreciated. Click the link below and it will take you to my fundraising page.

http://events.doctorswithoutborders.org/participant/bryanpayne