Sunday, April 5, 2015

A disciplined Easter...

I woke up tired. I got to bed too late and really needed at least an hour more sleep. It seems that when I don't get a full night of restful sleep I'm on edge. Noises are louder than normal and there is just this tingly haze I'm under.

Today was Easter and I was so looking forward to it. I missed it last year and Alice always makes this awesome meal and the house smells like Christmas, Easter or Thanksgiving. A special occasion.

Waking up this morning I was in the 195's for the second day in a row. A good sign. My tired feeling also felt like I was burnt out a bit. Much of the morning I was thinking about whether or not I should train or rest and recover.

The decision in the end wasn't that hard. My body is sore. It's still sore from yesterdays weight training session and I wasn't looking forward to working out. Not to mention the weather sucked.

Physically I'm feeling strong again. I can finally see some shape come back into my arms. I even did a round of body measurements today and had reductions in most areas. Except my waist. It's coming I can feel it.

Actually I had a major win yesterday. I got into a pair of pants I couldn't put on about a month ago. They are are a little snug around the waste but not noticeable after I put them on. It's amazing how just a little win like putting on a pair of pants that were too snug feels so great.

I did my weight loss hypnosis this afternoon. I'm officially addicted to it. There is something about listening to the guys voice that is super relaxing. It's no longer work for me to listen to it. I even started looking for other hypnosis tapes on You Tube.

Dinner was awesome. I ate slow and it was great. I think it was the most tastiest holiday dinner I've ever experienced in my life. There is just this new found enjoyment of food that I have and I swear it's due to the hypnosis.

After dinner Alice brought out a Dairy Queen Skor ice cream cake. Normally I'm all over it and would start and not be able to stop eating. This time I had no desire to eat it. I looked at it a number of times and I had more overwhelming feelings not to eat it than I did to eat it.

I even had the same experience with the kids chocolates that they got from the Easter bunny. They are 18 and 24 years old and the Easter bunny still comes. I love it.

So as I was watching them eat their candy and chocolate again I had not desire to eat any. In my minds eye I just see dead food. It's like I'm looking at food based on what will be good for my body. The only food that I'm on the fence with is air popcorn. It's like a border line treat of being good for you and being a treat.

There was even the turkey neck, something I love. After dinner I was going to watch TV and much on it and couldn't. In the old days I would have and now I just looked at it and realized I don't feel hungry and I'd only be eating it out of boredom and instead I put it in the fridge for later.

I can truthfully say I've never felt this way about food before. When I dieted in the past I'd totally use self discipline and will power to stop me from eating. Now it's more of a question of whether or not I'm really hungry or just bored and if it's not really hungry or intuitively feeling I need something I just reject the boredom.

This week I think I'm going to go back to doing some juicing for 4 or 5 days. I'm really wanting to get down another 5 lbs quickly. It's like I need to get into the 180's as quickly as possible. The 200's and 190's have bad memories for me, inside I'm not that fat. Inside I'm about a 175 - 180 lb person.

In the past I'd want to get to those weights and I'd set a goal but in my heart of hearts I knew it was wishful thinking. Not this time. This time I'm convinced I will get there. I visualize it and I'm beyond motivated to do it. It's more like I'm ready to get back down to that weight.

I envision this as a journey back home than a goal I'm trying to achieve. It's a very weird sensation and something I've never experienced before, in the slightest.

This afternoon I was messing around with ways to save money. I really want to get rid of our cable and stream everything off the TV if possible. I've already figured out how to block my Canadian IP address and purchase U.S. programing which is much better and then I heard about streaming from Sling that has the main channels we watch. What got me onto it was my anticipation to sign up for HBO when it starts streaming through Apple this month.

What's really cool is I realized there was a iPad I hadn't been using and would be the ultimate way to stream Sling to the TV.

I don't know what it is but I get super jazzed by figuring out computer technical stuff. Some guys like working on cars, or have a hobby like wood working. My hobby is playing on my computer and playing with different apps and making stuff work and try to troubleshoot things that aren't working. When I do that the hours just fly by.

My other hobby is social media. It's a nice distraction for me. It's kind of cool. I will say I miss the twitter of old. Now it's pretty much does a news feed of articles.

Anyhow it was a great day. Oh, and I'm ready to watch the new season of Mad Man on Sling tonight. I feel so good that I rested up and recovered. I probably should not be training more than 3 - 4 days straight in order to recover. I was reading something about an older athlete that workouts during the week and takes the weekends off.

Interesting approach. I don't know if I could do it. I like a long bike or run on the weekend. Who knows we'll see. Maybe I'll try it.

All I know is physically I really feel I'm shaping up and by the end of this month could be down to 185lbs. It's just starting to hit me. I'm close. I just need to stay the course. This is a mirror opposite of last year April where I didn't train and gained weight. This time I am training and I'm losing weight. The axis is crossing soon.

180's here I come.

Rest / Recovery
195.6 lbs.

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