Wednesday, April 8, 2015

I'm a little scared...

I wake up this morning, super tired. It's like for the past few days I've just woken up tired.

First thing I did is stand on the scale and it says 193.6 lbs. WTF? In two days I've dropped 2 lbs and I just cruised by the 195 lbs and now down to 193.6 lbs. I weighed myself before bed last night and I dropped over 3 lbs sleeping.

No wonder I'm waking up tired, my body is working overtime if it somehow is able to drop 3 lbs over only 7 hours of sleep.

All kidding aside I am a little worried. I'm not feeling very good. I noticed it back on Saturday and that's why I took Sunday and Monday off. I wasn't feeling well and figured I just needed to take a break from training.

During late last nights run I thought things were okay until about 20 minutes into my run. For the first 20 minutes my heart rate was around the 130's and after that it shot up into the 140's and 150's. For most that might not sound like much but for me it's not normal. There should be no reason and the speed I'm running and at the lower weight that my heart rate should get into the mid 140's or 150's.

I figured last night that maybe I'm just tired and let it pass.

Then this morning I wake up at 193.6 lbs. One part of me was like "awesome!" and another part of me was like "WTF, am I okay?"

I know I've been tired. For the past couple days and today I've had a hoarse voice and my ears have felt plugged.

The reason I'm a little paranoid is because the doctor got results of a blood work test that I have an over active thyroid. Then I went in for retesting last week and I haven't yet heard back. My mind is now wondering if my issues have to do with a thyroid or is it my diet or is it something else?

Another thing that is bugging me is my scale readings are all over the map. My scale measures weight, % body fat, lbs of muscle, body water content, bone density and visceral fat. The readings are messed up. The weight is going down and all the other readings are all over the map. It's like some sort of magnetic force is screwing them up.

Something is definitely wrong, but I'm not sure what it is and today's weight training session supported that something is wrong.

First off I felt weaker than normal. It's like I haven't been weight training. Secondly it's winding me. That never happens. Other than when I was juicing I've never had issues weight training. During parts of today's session I had to take a knee a couple of times. At one point I was truly fearful that I was going to pass out when I was doing lunges at the squat rack.

Of course that didn't stop me from doing them, that would be too smart and responsible of a thing to do. Instead I just visualized that if I passed out what would be the best way so that the bar didn't kill me. I concluded straight down would be best as they have a lower arm that would catch the bar.

After I was done I had to sit and then I had to crouch down and put my head between my legs. It wasn't pretty.

Last night was the first day training that I felt I have lost weight. My jacket at the shoulders was feeling looser. Today I noticed I was swimming in my workout shirt. I normally train in a medium shirt, then I upgraded to a large and now I'm swimming in it. It felt worse than having a too tight of a shirt. Today will be the last day I wear large, back to my skin tight medium.

When I got home from the gym I was light headed. Definitely a sign of diet. My voice was hoarse and I was on nothing but phone calls and meetings all day which didn't help. It never fails when you have a hoarse voice that all you do all day long is talk.

So I figured okay, if it's diet, I'm going to start eating more. Add more carbs and portions. So I did for dinner. As of 10 pm tonight it really hasn't helped. I still feel crappy, my heart seems to be palpitating and I'm burning up in my cheeks. I feel that I've lost a lot of muscle in the last 3 days. It's weird.

Tomorrow I'll call the doctor to see if he got my results back. Yet on the same tone I'm like "stay the course with this pain and suffering for another week and get down into the 180's". It's that instant gratification factor that I'd rather loose 5 lbs in one week than 1 pound per week for 5 weeks.

Either way we will see tomorrow. Hopefully I will get a good sleep and I don't have an overly active day of back to back meetings planned.

I'm also really excited to see what my body weight is tomorrow. The hypnosis is definitely working.

Just to put it all in perspective. At my all time high on February 2 I was 210 lbs and today I'm 193 lbs. I've dropped 16 lbs. Of those I've dropped about 12 of those pounds in the past 5 weeks. It kind of feels surreal.

The other part of me is saying damn I must have been fat as I still have another 16 lbs to go. Then I think don't think about it that way, just take it day by day and don't psych yourself out on the daunting number.

Not to mention I'm so glad I got my ass in gear and started to loose weight. Heck if I didn't I would still be 16 lbs heavier. I have to remind myself to put it in perspective.

Finally after training today I shaved and showered. It had been a couple days. It's amazing how nicely I can clean up.

Weights 45 min
193.6 lbs

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