It still wears on you. You eat right. You train. You want to see results everyday to keep the motivation up.
Then I realize I need to put it all into perspective. I've made some incredible progress since starting this diet. At my peak I was 210 lbs and I'm in the 193 range right now. That's 17 lbs. And if I even calculate that I was 206 lbs of real weight when I started, sans water, that is still a 13 lb weight loss.
Losing 13 - 17 lbs in about 6 weeks is pretty respectable and something to be proud of for sure. I keep having to remind myself of that.
Rather than patting myself on the back I want more and feel I'm not doing good enough. I think I want to get at least down to 180 lbs. That's another 13 lbs away and losing 13 lbs is not easy. It takes a lot of sacrifice and discipline.
If I put it into perspective, if I continue with the way I've been eating and training it's only another 6 weeks away. In the scheme of things that is not long.
I also know how great I will feel at 180 lbs. It's been about 6 years since I was 180 lbs. Not only will I look like a new person I will feel like a new person. I look back at photos of me at 180 lbs and I remember how rich life felt.
There is something about being at that weight for me. Life just feels better and I feel better. Even back then I wasn't mentally the same person I am now. Now I'm older and wiser and would appreciate being at that weight and value it.
I need to get there.
Just the past couple of days it's been hard and I don't know why. Again tonight to keep on track I went and did some hypnosis. It helped but isn't as strong as it was. I think I might have to find a new tape.
BUT I have to remind myself that I could still be at 207 - 210 lbs had I not decided to make the decision March 1st to start eating better. I felt awful at that weight. I hated it. I should be glad I'm not there. I should be happy and celebrate my success. I know that and I keep having to remind myself.
These next 6 weeks are going to be tough I think, even though I know 6 weeks in the scheme of things is not that hard.
I keep thinking about May and June and enjoying beers on the deck. Once you start having beers it's near impossible to lose weight. Maintaining weight is possible but losing weight is near impossible. I just want to get down to 180 lbs before I start having beers and I have this romance of really enjoying this summer.
Today I did some weight training. It was the first session since I started dieting that I didn't feel faint during. I think it was the pizza carbs and turkey sandwich from yesterday. It was another good workout and the effects last all day and night long. My muscles are sore in a good way all night long.
As I was training something came over me and I was thinking that maybe I should do some short triathlon races this year, some sprints and Olympics and MAYBE a half Ironman.
When I got home I started googling local races and remembered the last time I did local short course races was in 2007 when I decided to drop 50 lbs and get back into shape. In fact I realized the other day I dropped 59 lbs at one point.
Back in 2007 I raced a sprint or Olympic distance race almost every weekend. It was kind of fun because the races were all over Ontario and as a family we spent weekends travelling and staying at hotels and even camping once and seeing all parts of Ontario.
Perhaps it is the romance of that time I want to duplicate? Maybe. If I do Milton it will be second time, the only other time was when I near died in the swim in 2007 because my wetsuit was too tight and I finished I think 3rd to last out of 570 people.
There is also a part of me that thinks I need to get back into the water and the swim. The last time I swam was Ironman Boulder and I thought I was going to drown and it was the worse swim ever and I came so close to quitting. I guess I feel I need to get back on that horse.
I'm also chomping at the bit to ride my bike tomorrow. The weather looks like it's going to be 17 C and I just have this urge to get on the bike and do a two hour ride, or more. In fact if it was warm all week long I feel I'd ride every single day. I love riding and perhaps in my subconscious I think it will peel off some weight.
Yesterdays ride I could tell my gut has gotten a lot smaller. It started to feel like the old days when I had no gut. It felt good.
Last year was perhaps the worse March to June I've ever had in my life. For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction and I want this March to June to be the exact opposite. So far I'm on track for March.
As I finished listening to my hypnosis tonight I woke up and as I was lying in my bed and looking around the room I was so happy. I remember almost every morning waking up in Boise and looking out the window and feeling trapped. Everything about the condo in Boise I cringe at even now. The furniture was uncomfortable, the lightening was uncomfortable, the weather was too cool and the area where the condo was situated was drab and the terrain flat and I just felt like I was somewhat imprisoned.
Not to mention I gained so much weight there by trying to free myself by going to the local bars to work from a different location and of course that means beer and pizza and burgers and fries. All in all I gained 13 lbs last year from March to June 1st.
I can confidently say that I would never leave my family again for any prolonged period of time. Life is so rich being around your loved ones and living in the comfort of your own home.
So April is my moment of truth and I know it. All I need to do is be a good boy and stay the course and any short term pain will be long term gain all summer long.
My training I'm wanting to do 7 - 12 hours max this summer and do some weekend races to keep me strong and as part of my fitness program.
This year is kind of a redo from last year. Last year I left home and started Salmon Social Mid February and officially started in March. It was a successful ride creating the app and all the marketing fun in Boise and in September I decided to pull the pin.
Fast forward 12 months and almost to the day, my new venture Deal Wheel begins. It took me over 4 months to create and validate a business plan and in February I raised the money. We officially started developing the app on February 23rd. Basically one exact year give or take a week.
Very rarely does a circumstance like that happen. You have the first 12 months that you build an app and experience and learn so much. Then you realize the mistakes you made and learn from them and start something new with a whole new level of experience and knowledge.
I guess in business it may not happen very much. In Ironman and sports it happens all the time. You train, you race, you learn, you repeat. Just thinking about it I feel super lucky to have this business do over. Reality is I would be where I am now had it not been for the Salmon Social personal experience. Back then I knew Salmon Social was a super big long shot, this time around with Deal Wheel it's far from a long shot, all it's going to take is strong execution.
My mantra right now is "stay the course" and "put it all in perspective".
Weights - 40 minutes
194.2 lbs
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